The Joo, The Hair and The Dreams

I’ve finally started on my revision and the sheer amount of things that I’m supposed to know is just overwhelming. But I know that I must find a way to get everything memorised well because there’s no other option. Expect to be bitching and whining the whole way though.

Final lab tomorrow! I’ll have to start on that lab report asap if I want to free up time during Easter to even decently do my Cultural Studies module. Why oh why did I think Cultures of Everyday Life would be simple/interesting??? Damn these philosophers and sociologists. I think I’m going to do spectacularly poor on that module. Hope it doesn’t pull everything else down by too much.

On a brighter note, my iHerb order just came today! =) Got a refund for 2 items because both leaked during delivery. But still excited to try my shea butter soaps and moisturizer.

Why am I so unproductive when I stay in my room? Is it because my environment is too familiar so I’m conditioned to relaxing whilst in this setting? (Gotta figure out if that’s classical conditioning or something else. xD) I should drag myself out to the library and clock in a few decent hours of studying. Arghhhhh! *procrastinates* Maybe tomorrow?

I guess I’m happy where my 20 years of existence has taken me. I never dreamed that this would be what I would be doing with my life but it just goes to show that life’s road has so many twists and bends that sometimes you can’t see what’s ahead.

20… nothing too special about it I guess. Just dipping a toe to test the waters of adulthood.

My first birthday celebrated so far away from home. I’m sure it’ll be like any other day. But somehow, I sort of feel like I’m entering a new stage where I have to take on a greater share of responsibilities in life.

I’m pretty sure the years will just go by like a blink of the eye and before I know it, I’ll be thinking about the same things now just before I turn 30.

Well, I’ll just keep living this life then and see what happens. =)

Hmm… was just extolling the virtues of spamming past year exam papers in order to succeed at MCQ exams to C. Because my school doesn’t provide past year questions for MCQ exams so I was politely “requesting” that my personal tutor compile some revision questions for us so that we could sort of check our own revision progress.

But then C says that I’m sounding and behaving like an arrogant prick (OK, prick is my word. lol). Which I don’t really understand because the reason why people from my country excel at exams is because of our exam smarts. This is just the way I work. I’m not boasting to be a genius or anything, in fact, I actually believe I’m not really all that smart. But the only reason I am where I am today is through the education system and style of studying that I’ve been influenced by all my life. I get that the other people I’m studying with are used to something else. But then what results do they have to show for it?

I’m not in uni to dick around. I actually want that first class honours. Everyone has their own ways of achieving excellence. You want something bad enough, you do everything you can to get it. I’m not stepping on anyone to get to the top, I’m just gonna claw my way up there even if I have to work myself to death. It’s all on me. (Wow, that’s incredibly self-absorbed and egocentric)

But is that attitude one of arrogance? Oh well, one more aspect of character building to work on in order to attain enlightenment I guess.

And just a sidenote: First CNY spent in a foreign country (other than M’sia)!

It’s been a looooooooooong time since I last blogged. Ah well, first three months of uni in the UK wasn’t all that exciting anyway. I guess I was just expecting too much out of the whole thing. But I’ll always have to remember my first priority is studying hard and experiencing as much as I can.

So, since it’s a new year, I’ll just start off with some resolutions. I don’t know if I ever manage to stick to any of these as the 365 days pass. But we’ll see.

1. Be a friend to those who need one.
2. Complain less.
3. Refrain from procrastinating.
4. Be a kinder person.
5. Be less judgmental.
6. Be braver.

I’ve been receiving a lot of opinions about long distance relationships. I know all of them are given with good intentions but I find some quite hard to accept.

I want to be in a committed relationship with my guy forever. I keep telling myself and others (and him) that I can’t wait for the day I marry him and start a life and family together.

4 year of study overseas… Change may be inevitable. I can’t begin to imagine what it’ll be like. Will Skype, MSN and email be enough?

But I’ll just keep wanting it to be enough and keep wanting our future together harder.

If he reads this someday, I want him to know there will always be a kiss and a hug from me to him.